friendlyrecipes-friends.blogspot.com

to all of those interested...Connie and I have created a recipe blog. if you would like to post a recipe e-mail us at...friendsrecipes123@yahoo.com

as you add a recipe and your name isn't on our "friends" list on the side of the blog...we will add you!

Connie has a lot more ideas we can do w/ this...more to come. check it out daily!

i think it's time....

i just measured my hair in a pony tail and it was more than 12 inches! i think i just need 10-12". i'm going to look up salons here in town that can help me! can't wait to get a new doooo!

Recipe Blog

Connie had an idea of creating a "Recipe Blog" where we - our friends that read our blogs regularly - could post their favorite recipes. at the moment i'm apart of an "e-mail your favorite easy recipe" chain. i guess that's what you could call it. anyway, at the end of it i should have 36 recipes. so far i have gotten 5 and they sound delish.

so since today is a slow day for me i'm gonna create our recipe blog.

check out...

www.inhabitedtheband.com
www.mattpapa.com
my new addition to my blog over on the right side..."Mattie and Ryder say the darndes things". i'll be updating this often.

Locks of Love....a two year journey

ok. The first two pics are of me and my VERY short hair cut back in December of 2005. That is the last time i have had my hair cut. We still lived in Texas. The last two are current pics. i've cut bangs but not length. anyway, at Thanksgiving this year my sister, Connie, mentioned that i should continue growing it out and donate it to "Locks of Love". side note - i know of two people that have grown their hair out and donated it...Meagan Meaux (Friendship) and Emily Free (Calvary). I had been thinking about getting a new style when she mentioned this so i wasn't too excited aout having to continue growing it out. I had heard of "Locks of Love" but never seriously thought about growing my hair for the sole purpose to donate it to this "organization". i guess the Lord has changed my mind so now my hair has a purpose :)...

below you will find an explanation of this non-profit organization.


Locks of Love is a public non-profit organization that provides hairpieces to financially disadvantaged children under age 18 suffering from long-term medical hair loss from any diagnosis. We meet a unique need for children by using donated hair to create the highest quality hair prosthetics. Most of the children helped by Locks of Love have lost their hair due to a medical condition called alopecia areata, which has no known cause or cure. The prostheses we provide help to restore their self-esteem and their confidence, enabling them to face the world and their peers.

Mission Statement

Our mission is to return a sense of self, confidence and normalcy to children suffering from hair loss by utilizing donated ponytails to provide the highest quality hair prosthetics to financially disadvantaged children. The children receive hair prostheses free of charge or on a sliding scale, based on financial need.


I'll keep you updated on this journey....

A. I. - one more thing

i just saw a news video on yahoo that was telling about 3 A. I. contestants that once had record deals or were lead singers in bands. hhmmm. personally i don't think they should be on this show. two of the girls had MAJOR record deals but couldn't "cut the mustard". the last guy that sang last night was or is a lead singer in a band and he was my favorite besides the dread lock dude. anyway, i hope that the two girls don't make it too far.

i'm hooked.

American Idol. started watching it during the first season but not "religiously". watched the whole season of 2006 but skipped last year. bypassed the city auditions this year and now i've picked up at "hollywood"!! if anyone's intersted, besides my sister,...two of these guys will be cut tonight after we hear from the 12 girls! Simon is HEEElarious!

the things kids say....

this is a paper copy of a picture of Mattie when she was 1 years old. My mom used this when making invitations to her first birthday party. anyway, mom keeps this on her "make up table" in her bedroom. Me and the kids and Connie and the girls were visiting this weekend and Connie was getting ready one morning at the "make up table". Mattie walks in and see's the picture and asks, "who is that" connie says, "you". Mattie's reply was..............."i didn't know i used to be black".

hahahahahahahahaha

just for fun...

wanted to do something fun today and this is what i came up w/....

*get back in touch w/ a childhood or college friend
*buy a coke for the cashier at wal-mart
*call your grandparents or write them a note
*let your kids eat dessert first
*let them play out in the rain and get all muddy
*tell your husband he has the kids for the night and go to a chick flick w/ a girlfriend or just by yourself
*write a note to a mentor and let them know the impact they had on your life
*try not to speak a negative word today to your spouse or children or to yourself
*keep fresh flowers on your dining room table
*let the laundry go for a few days....it's very "freeing":)
*speak to a stranger and watch their reaction
*buy lunch for the car behind you in the drive-thru or at least put $5 toward it
*take your kids to the library on a rainy day
*let them pick out supper tonight and fix it no matter what it is :)
*read a book just for fun....and beth moore bible studies are not "for fun":)
*tell your husband he's "in charge", run a bath w/ LOTS of bubbles, lock the bath room door, light the candles, turn on some old school 80's music and just soak

Happy Heart Day!

this day is very special to me. our story began on February 14, 1996. Well, it kind of started before that....I had met Brian back in 1994 during the Summer. He had come to ETBU to visit Brock Gill - this was before he started going there. anyway,when he started going there i new him to be one of those crazy guys that baptized people in the fountain in the quad. he and brock were not afraid to be "daring" and "make waves" with the faculty regarding their evanglelistic ways. i never thought of him as someone i'd be interested in b/c i thought he was way younger than me and way too crazy. and i honestly didn't feel "spiritual" enough to be a close friend - that was all in my head nothing he had done or said. well, my good friend shelly hill asked me what i thought about him one day and i was like, "he's really nice and friendly but too young". one night she and i were on our way to a basketball game (melissa knows why i was going:))and brian and i met each other as we were walking in the gym. he immediately gave me a hug. if you know brian you know he loves to hug and is very friendly and outgoing. later shelly again asked me what i thought about him, told me how old he was and i began looking at him in a different way. i told her i wouldn't mind getting to know him and maybe going on a date w/ him. she inturn told him. later she told me that when she told him i was interested in him he couldn't beleive it. funny! well, she got us to go to the movies - grumpy old men - with a group of us. we didn't even end up sitting by each other. there were like 10 people in between us. i'd look down the row and he'd be waving and smiling really big. he's crazy. anyway, later we went to Taco Bell and sat by each other there w/ other friends and just visited. i worked in the bookstore and he'd come by and visit often. bye me reeces peanut butter cups. i had had a very tough sr year and wasn't ready for anything. all this was happening during Februaary and Valentines Day came up. at this point i wasn't as interesed anymore but he continued to pursue. i was walking to the library from the cafeteria and saw his car outside of my dorm. then i saw him giving my roomate, libbey avery, something through the kitchen window. i went on to the library then eventually made it back to my dorm. he had a rose and a small gift in a box waiting for me in my room. the note on the rose said, "hope this makes your "Yuck Day" a little better". i had recently told him that i was calling valentines day "yuck day". i need to add there was another situation going on while all this was going on that's why i had kind of changed my mind about him. anyway, he had tried calling to make sure i got the gift and rose. but i was gone. later i left a message on his dorm phone - before cell phones were so accessible - thanking him for the valentine. i wasn't ready for this relationship so i kind of backed off and in turn he backed off. he later said that he didn't want to continue pursuing me b/c i wasn't acting like i was interested. well, that's all it took for me. playing hard to get. he has since told me that he doesn't "play games". ha ha. when he backed off i started getting interested in him again. and that other situation kind of took care of itself. i remember it like it was yesterday....it was friday at lunch, i had skipped my history class and was eating lunch in the cafeteria. i sat by him and some others while we were eating. he and i started talking and he said that if i wasn't busy i could go home to his parents house in natch., la for the weekend. i said ok. he was shocked. after lunch we went walking and talking about all kinds of stuff. he worked at kroger and didn't get off until 2 am. if you can beleive it....he left me his red two door firebird - that goes really really fast - so i could pick him up later and we'd drive to his parents house. how crazy is that. i didn't even tell my parents where i was going. well, i picked him up and drove us to natch. for the weekend. he held my hand while i was driving. funny. on saturday night we went to the movies w/ his brother and sister in law. the moving wasn't good so he kept asking me during it if he could kiss me. i was like no your brother is right next to us. hahahaha. well, i let him kiss me later that night:) the weekend was march 1, 1996. we would date for 4 years and get married on the same day that we started dating 4 years earlier. we broke up one time for 3 months in 1997. i literally thought i was going to die. i remember sitting in the hallway of my trailer - this is after i had graduated but he was still going to school - and crying and crying and crying thinking i'd never find anyone else. during that time, he and brock had started traveling doing their magic thing. i got them to come to my home church to do a kid show - obviously this was in the beginning of brock's ministry 'cause he don't do kid shows no mo - meredith came down for the weekend to help me get through it. i was soo nervous b/c we were broken up. it went ok. it just made it very hard for me to heal. well, the lord had a different plan and led us back together christmas of 1997. i drove to his parents house and when i got there he took me in his arms and hugged me for a long time. he had grown a beard and was waiting to show me before he shaved it off hahaha. later that day he told me, "i love you and want to marry you but not till i graduate". we were married march 4, 2000 and have been having a blast living life to the fullest since! can't wait to see what happens next! (picture: these are the flowers he brought to me this morning for valentines:))

misunderstood and it's my fault

my post about taking vacations and paying off debt kind of got turned in a different direction than i had intended it to. so i'd like to "unmisunderstand" everybody:) as of march 18th, i think that's the exact date, connie and levi will have paid off their debt and in less than 2 years. everyone that commented have personal situations that are each different so their comments reflected that. i would like to say that she and her fam were just "scrimping" (i think that's an appropriate word) on vacationing, cable, eating out - which of course they do)just during this "pay off period". mia and jules get what they want :) just like other kids do. they have a blast as a family. they just chose to cut back for about 2 years.....not a life time of no vaca's, etc. they will go on family vaca's, have their cable and be out of debt. Lord willing they will stay out:) i felt like i needed to "clear the air" and i hope i've accomplished that.....

"ok, so who wants some ice cream?"

"uh, i do i do and make it cookies & cream!"

the many faces of Ryder Creek!

me

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the first picture is of me and brian while we were dating, then it's us at our wedding, the next one is me pg w/ Mattie, then it's auny, mer, and me at Pensacola Beach one year after i had mattie, then it's me at Ryder's one year b-day party, next it's mattie, mia, jules, Ann and Me pg w/ Ryder, then me and Brian last summer and SuperWow youth camp, and the last one is of us at Christmas this year.
when i found out i was pg w/ Matt i weighed aproximately 126 lbs. so the whole time i'm carrying her my goal was to get back to 126 lbs. i thought it was going to be so easy. well, my final wieght w/ Mattie was 176 lbs. :0! long story short...mattie was born in june and during the next six months i attempted to lose the weight but it wasn't until January '02 that i put my mind to it. i found out that if i ate less than 1000 calories a day, i would lose 1 lb a day and i also went on the special K diet...replace 2 meals w/ a bowl of cereal and eat a sensible meal. so for the next 30 days that's what i did. i was obsessed...i memorized the calories in every kind of food you can think of. if we were going out i'd look up how many calories would be in my meal before i went. it was crazy but i lost roughly 30 lbs in 30 days....i kept that weight off for almost 2 years. the pic of me, auny, and mer is 1 year after mattie! the next year i lost more wieght. i got down to 123lbs at one time. well, i haven't seen the 120's or 130's on my scale since 2004. that is when i started gaining. when i found out i was pg w/ ryder, i was about 144 lbs. my final weigh in w/ ryder was 197 lbs. :0. that was august of 2005. after i lost the "baby weight" right after having him i'd say my "normal" weight (haha) was in the 160's. last spring i got down to 140 lbs. i tried very hard to get into the mid 130's. then i just gave up. FYI...i just got on the scale and my weight is 152 lbs. w/ clothes and shoes. hmmm not as bad as i thought. i could loose this weight if i put my mind to it. it wouldn't be that difficult. i really should. it probably wouldn't take too long. well, there's always tomorrow right....

is this all it's cracked up to be?

i thougt i'd post my reply to meredith's comment about vacations....

this is how i look at life...we are given one..only one. we must take every opportunity to live it to the fullest and of course spread the love of Jesus as we go. go. enjoy. vacations keep you sane. brian and i go on at least one, most of the time two, every year. you have to. work work work, isn't how it's supposed to be, in my opinion. jesus traveled. he spent His last 3 years on earth moving from place to place. yeah we should be saving and paying off debt and the Lord says we are slave to the lender. and we will in time. it'll just take us a little longer. i will say the one thing we waste our money on the most is eating out...waste, waste, waste. it makes me ill. we have gotten a little better but we average eating out about 3 times a week. 2 times too many i might add.


i humbly tip my hat to all my friends and family that are living the "dave ramsey" life. i am envious. your determination and "gut wrenching" pay off tactics are to be respected. you go w/out many luxuries in order to pay off your debt in an timely manner. My sister for example. she and levi have been on ONE vacation since they've been married and that was in honor of their 1 year anniversary in 2002. visiting family is NOT a vacation. they do not have cable/satellite. they do not eat out much if at all. she doesn't even get the luxury of taking her girls to Mother's Day Out b/c it's STUPID expensive where they live. levi works overtime every week. and they are little by little paying their debt. she's a very determined person. Michawn and Joel paid off their debt before they entered the mission field. Meredith worked very hard before she and Matt got married to pay off her debt. My parents work VERY hard at making decisions that do not have a consequence of debt. when we were growing up, mom and dad would pack a picnic lunch, drive to Bryan, and eat lunch in the park instead of going out to eat. connie and i NEVER went w/out anything. if we wanted it and it was w/in reason we got it. we never felt deprived. they were good stewards of their money and still were able to keep their two daughters in style w/ out getting into a lot of debt.

bottom line: we all have our opinions and convictions. just got to let the Lord lead.

word vomit....

it's something that happens to me often. i get nervous and just start talking about random stuff. then i start giving "too much information". i loose my train of thought and say, "now why am i talking about this". it's all very embarrasing. it happened just today. one of my friends stopped by the church and we start talking...small talk...blah blah blah. then it happens i can feel it coming. can't stop it and the words come and come and come. if you've seen "mean girls", the character that lindsey lohan plays has this same problem.

just thought i'd share...

another lost tooth and wisdom

aren't those eyes georgeous!!!

Mattie lost her second tooth tuesday night. however she was dissapointed yesterday morning when all the tooth fairy left her were coins instead of dollars. i didn't feel sorry for her. but what i did do is tell the tooth fairy how unhappy the poor little girl was b/c she didn't get dollars. the tooth fairy will remember this for next time....and she better be lucky to get a penny after this.(she was eating french fries when i took the picture of the second lost tooth so ya might see a little leftovers:))

We are having to make some decisions regarding mattie, her "lack of attention span", and her education. pray for us. she's having a VERY hard time. she likes going to school but does NOT understand how important learning is or care that she's on the verge of failing first grade.

Ryder slide show #2

i guess you can only make 2 slide shows a day....i have tried over and over to make these pics into a slide show but obviously it didn't work...anyway enjoy!

And here he is...slide part 1

scroll down past the "last vaca" slide and you can read about Ryder's birth....

Last Vaca w/ just the 3 of us!

Ryder Creek Britt

Well, by the time Mattie turned 3 in June of 04, (brian was always ready so let's just say...) I was ready for another one! I got off bc and i knew it was going to take a few months probably and it did. well, one of my very best friends in the whole wide world was getting married in December of '04...Meredith Rae ...FINALLY!:):):) Mattie and I were staying w/ my sister while i was doing the whole wedding rehearsal...bachelorrete party...wedding stuff. while we were there that weekend i somehow i figured out Connie was going to have another one. it was something that was said. i can't remember exactly. anyway, it was a secret so i couldn't tell anyone. Well, Christmas came and Connie & Levi shared w/ the family about their next addition. At the time i was pg but didn't know. then in january we found out i was going to have another one. we wanted to tell everyone one in an intersting way so i made a shirt that said "big sister" and let mattie wear it when we came to visit my parents one weekend...connie and mia were there too. eveybody was excited but shocked. mattie wore that shirt to church the next sunday to let all our Friendship family know too. they were excited too. well, since i had a c-section w/ mattie Dr. Dowdy said it would be better to just go ahead and schedule one for Ryder. fine w/ me. looking back i wish i had pushed him to let me let Ryder tell me when he was ready....but we went ahead and scheduled it for Aug. 24,2005. i was VERY nervous and emotional and scared b/c i didn't want to happen w/ Ryder what had happened w/ Mattie....blood transfusion. so we get there...Brian and Mattie, my parents, connie and the girls, and Brian's parents were all there, Bro. Dennis & Mrs. Aline were there too. They take me in, numb me up, strap me down, and as they are taking Ryder out i start freakin' b/c i was having a lot of trouble breathing. i do NOT remember this happening w/ mattie. i could feel a lot of pressure while they were doin' their thing but Dr. Dowdy kept reassuring me it was ok. that was a little weird but all in all everything went well. I didn't get to see Ryder while in the recovery room or anyone else for that matter. it was me and a nurse. so i get to my room and all my fam is there. they bring ryder in ....this was all very diferent than w/ Mattie. i knew what to expect and the hospital stay was great. all our friends from church came. our good friend Corey, brought all the youth over to see us. they were excited. all was good. no tears, no sadness. just happy. the recovery was good. I will say that it was hard getting used to, strange as it may sound, there being 4 of us instead of 3. Funny, with Mattie i was having such a hard time with our family being 3 instead of 2. But now i couldn't IMAGINE our life w/out either one of them. We love 'em sooo much. Ryder is handsome, funny, loving, caring, crazy, tough yet tender, sweet, stubborn and hardheaded but loveable. He's our Man Baby!

Recovery...

if you don't know by now, i've joined the "birth story telling band wagon" and i'm telling Mattie's now and i'll tell Ryder's next. here goes....Well, i'm in recovery watching and listening to Mattie scream her head off for four hours...real fun. at the time we lived in Groves, Texas and Brian was the Youth Minister at Friendship Baptist. Mrs. Aline, Bro. Dennis, and Laurie (our pastor, his wife and daughter) each came in to talk to me and then family came in i think..i was pretty out of it. but then they took me to my room and brought mattie in. i finally get to hold her:) i attempted to nurse her...not so fun. during the whole hospital stay i tried...the nurses tried to help...but it just wasnt' happening. i thought i was "educated" on all that but i wasn't. My family was there, Brian's family and big Bro were there, my Grandaddy and Ann were there. Then our friends from church would come and visit. Friendship holds a very special place in our hearts...they got to be apart of our first child's birth and our second one, too. very special time. the youth were away at leadership camp that same week and they would call the hospital to check on us...very sweet! brian had just gotten a video camera, so he decides to set it up on the tripod and video. on the first morning after she was born he set it up and started recording. it is soooo funny now to watch it. he recorded me eating my first meal in like 30 something hours. i mean i was chompin' down on those grits and toast as he was brushing out the tangles in my hair. i'd be like, "ow" b/c he was pulling my hair...and let me tell you NO ONE touches my hair ask Connie. i'm just like my mom! so for him to be brushing my hair was funny in itself..but back to the "ow" part...i would take a bite and scrunch my face up in pain b/c he was hurting my "tender" head....hahahahaha good times. Brian took such good care of me...very loving and attentive. anyway, one thing i didn't tell is that while i was still pg w/ Matt, i was supposed to be taking iron pills - i was anemic(sp?). well, i quit taking them b/c they hurt my stomach. so during the c-section i apparently lost a lot of blood. when i was back in my room, i was getting up to go to the bathroom and the nurse had to catch me b/c i almost fainted. at that point Dr. Dowdy was like ok let's start giving her blood. i had to get A LOT of blood but first i get to sign my life away on this paper that says i won't sue the hospital if i get some kind of disease from the blood they're going to give me. ok first you have to know that Brian and I both "waited" till we got married wink wink nudge nudge. so i'm crying in the bed thinking, "i waited 26 years to have sex and found a guy who waited too and now i'm fixin' to get somebody elses blood that might give me some kind of disease." it was all very stressful and scary but i had to do it. so yeah how fun was that. not very. anyway, my dad would get up early each moring i was in the hospital and come visit me. he had to leave mom and connie in groves b/c he had to get back to work and also b/c my PawPaw, his dad, was VERY ill and he needed to get back w/ him. his birthday came will mom and connie were still w/ me...he had to be alone on his b-day but he was very sweet about it. well, we make it through the hospital stay and on the last day i'm waiting to see the doctor and i just start crying. i didn't really know why but i just knew i wanted to get home to be w/ the rest of my fam. Dr. Dowdy came in and was like, "ok why the tears" and i was like "i don't know". he said, "if this lasts for more than two weeks come in and see me." - he even got one of his nurses to call me when i got home to check on me and reassure me! i knew about the "baby blues" so i figured it was that. on the way home Brian stopped like two times to make sure mattie was ok in her car seat...he so funny. Mom, Connie, and Sue were waiting for us when we got there....roast, potatoes, and carrots were in the oven yum yum! so we get home and get settled. b/c i had a nice incision from the c-section it was very painful to walk and even laugh. i remember it took 2 weeks until it wasn't as painful to get up and down and walk around. now to the part about how i wasnt' ready for mother hood...i didn't even change her diaper for a while b/c i just didn't want to. i was scared i would do it wrong. funny now but not then. connie would come in the living room and be like, "mattie needs to be changed" and i'd say, "you can do it". when Connie and mom were getting ready to leave i would just cry and cry. i cried a lot that week. But Sue stayed an extra week after theyleft so that was a big help! i remember Michawn calling and checking on me and all i could do is cry and tell her of all the thinkgs i wasn't going to be able to do w/ Brian now that Mattie was here. so strange now to think back on all this. Mattie is right there w/ us in all we do now. she loves to ski and loves to swim. our to favorite things to do. funny. anyway....The blues lasted about two weeks. but during those two weeks my sister gets married. i'm so mad at myself b/c i couldn't even enjoy it as much as i wanted to. i couldn't be what is was supposed to be for her. i didn't even get to stay at the house w/ all the girls that were at the bachelorette party b/c i had to get back to this new baby...we stayed at my Grandaddy's house that night. i vividly remember being at the rehearsal dinner sitting next to Connie and she looks over at me and was like, "what's wrong" and in my head i was saying..."i don't know" but i can't remember what i told her. Our friends the Brantly's were keeping Mattie during the rehearsal and dinner so that was very nice not having to worry about Matt during all that. It got worse....i don't know if Connie even remembers this but i actually yelled at my mom during the family picture part...i yelled at her in front of all our family. Ann (my step grandmother but really she's my grandmother) tried to help me by sitting and talking w/ me during the rest of the picture session. my emotions were soooo messed up. (Connie please don't be mad at me for saying all this) i was happy and excited for connie but i couldn't show it like i wanted to. During the wedding, our friend, Sandra Bailey watched Matt, so that was nice. Well, we get her married and while she takes off on her honeymoon and new life w/ Levi....i'm left w/ this baby i'm supposed to be excited about but it just wasn't happening. of course i loved her but it was all so strange to me. well, my emotions and hormones finally got straightened out but it literally took me 3 years to get used to having a child. weird i know. i've always been crazy about my Matt girl but i just had to get used to her...hahahaha. She's means more to me/us than we could have ever imagined. she's beautiful, fun, loving, caring, sweet, hard headed, stubborn, loves her family, loves making friends, loves skiing, loves swimming, loves life, she looks like me but has her daddy's personality...thank God!...i love my Matt girl! Ryder Creek Britt's story next....

My sweet Matt girl!

(first, if you would like to know the answer to my own "?" about the "quiver being full" topic, scroll down to the previous post.) joining the band wagon...Michawn is so graciously and beautifully sharing her birth stories on her blog, Leah shared some of her's and Amanda (Bradford) has been sharing her's too....so i thought i'd share mine....and would LOVE to hear the birth stories of...my beautiful sister, Melissa, and Mer!! any other friends of mine that read this w/ kids.
Well, i told a little bit in my post titled "answering my on ?" about how i was feeling when she got here so i thought i'd share how she got here:)I was two weeks late. Connie had come down for the birth. My parents and his parents were going to wait until it was time. Well, the doc said, "two weeks... too long so lets induce". i had in my mind i was going to do it the "all natural way" w/ drugs:). well, they started the pitocin (sp?) and broke my water at about 7 am Tuesday, June 5, 2001. i got up to go to the bathroom shortly after and as i was standing there and all this water came out...i thought i was "usin' the bathroom" right there on the floor but it was just my water. scared me. i hollered at my mom and was like i didn't just use the bathroom on the floor so she got the nurse for me. anyway, no big deal. i got back to bed, the contractions started coming harder and consistantly. they gave me something to knock me out in between contractions. i would wake up from a dead "sleep" and start breathing in my nose out my mouth. Brian and the nurse would encourage me and tell me how much longer the contraction was going to last, tell me it's almost over, then i'd go out. one time i woke up and Connie, my mom, and Sue (brian's mom) were standing at the end of my bed and staring at me and talking about me (from my take on it). i took my hand and waved them out the door. it's funny now but not then...connie can tell that story better:) by that after noon i hadn't progressed much at all and they tried an epidural wich after MANY failed attempst didn't take but still had to pay for. brian almost passed out b/c he hadn't eaten anything.. i was siiting on the edge of the bed crying during the contractions and crying b/c they were sticking a needle in my back..he was standing in front of me holding my hands, after several minutes of all this stress his face went white and he almost went down on the floor but the nurse got to him first and then they started taking care of him...my mom thought all the hustle and bustle was for me but it was for my sweet Brian. it had been about 10 hours of unnatural ungodly labor and i still hadn't progressed past maybe 6, the doc said, "enough is enough. lets do a c-section". i was like, "whatever just get her out." i think that was my exact words. but a main concern of mine was making sure i was going to be able to be in my sisters wedding which was about a week and a half away. so i made sure i was going to be able to be in it and they started prepping me for surgery. it was all very strange. brian was freakin' out but i didn't know it. there's a pic of him sitting on the floor of the hallway while they were getting me ready in the room. he looked pitiful. he was mad and scared - i had been in pain for almost 12 hours, all along thinking it was going to be one way and now it was totally different...surgery. well, by the time they let him in i was all smiles b/c they had given me some "numb me from my neck down" drugs and i was pain free and happy. when they were taking her out brian heard the doctor say, "there's two" brian was like "WHAT" then the doc said that the cord was wrapped around her neck twice. oh the plans of man and how they fail... i so wanted the "other kind of birth" but had it gone in that direction Matt girl may not be here w/ us...her heart beat never dropped while she was still in the womb so they had no idea that the cord was wrapped around her kneck... TWICE. wow. thank you jesus. anyway, one of the down sides to the c-section was when Matt was out, cleaned up and ready to be held i couldn't hold her....my arms were strapped to the table. all i could do was look at her. i remember Mer. calling me while i was still in the hospital and crying as i told her i couldn't even hold Matt right when she was born. but my sweet brian was right there w/ me and got to hold her and he put her up to my face so i could kiss her. i was in rcovery for about 4 hours and there was a monitor in the room so i could see Matt....she screamed for 4 hours straight...angry she was i tell you! i'm going to stop here and tell my recovery in a different post.....

whoa mamma!

this is for all you girls who just think you gain weight during pregnancy. this is the night before i had ryder. we were eating w/ my fam at Casa Ole'...aka MY FAVORITE MEXICAN FOOD PLACE EVER!! michawn will agree and connie's gag reflex is coming in just about now! hahahahahaha. double click on the pics to get the full effect.

thought i'd throw this one out there:)

answering my on ?...

well, bottom line i never really thought about it much. i just figured two's enough for me. brian LOVES kids adores his own, but says i'm the one that does "all the work" so really it's whatever i want. but i dont' want it to be like that. i want it to be whatever the Lord wants. yeah life in general is expensive, kids, extracurricualr activities, college...all expensive and having more kids makes doing things more difficult. but who am i to say "no more kids for me/us" w/out searching for what the Lord says. i also think about those families who can't have kids or who have tried adoption and its not worked out for them. how blessed am i to be able to have children. it literally took me 3 years to get "used to " mattie. of course i loved her but i wasn't ready to be a mother. i wanted time w/ brian just the two of us. and those of you who know our story fully understand how important that was to me. well, we got about 5 months of that "alone time" then found out i was pg. happy yes. excited yes. then she came. and the tears of joy came then tears of "not ready for this" came. i wasn't in depression but was not ready for all that goes along w/ being a mother. which time took care of itself obviously:) by the time i "got used to her little sweet very active self", i was ready for ryder. only tears of joy this time. i say all that to say... where ever the Lords leads we'll go. life is too short to take it so seriously. and i have a tendancy to WORRY about everthing. so thanks to my friends that left the comments....much appreciated and very helpful!

when is your quiver full.

just wondering what my friends thoughts on this "topic" were. my thoughts later. comment away friends....seriously i'd like to know what y'all think. FYI...i'm NOT preggo but this has been on my heart lately...

update...
as of saturday morning i've heard from leah, michawn, and mer! connie...melissa your thoughts. anyone else who reads my blog... got an opinion? like i said in my response to mer...i'm still praying and searching. yall's respnses so far have an underlying theme...let the Lord guide you. so much easier said than done...

ice ice baby too cold and tanya tucker!

nothing like getting in your frigid car, crankin' it up, and vanilla ice is playing on the radio..."ice ice baby too cold...vanilla ice ice baby, too cold" hahahahaha then i switch it and land on Tanya Tucker..."world says they'll never make it, love says they will..." oldies but goodies.

hope that's not some gang sign and i'm gonna get taken out...hahahahaha