Ryder Creek Britt

Well, by the time Mattie turned 3 in June of 04, (brian was always ready so let's just say...) I was ready for another one! I got off bc and i knew it was going to take a few months probably and it did. well, one of my very best friends in the whole wide world was getting married in December of '04...Meredith Rae ...FINALLY!:):):) Mattie and I were staying w/ my sister while i was doing the whole wedding rehearsal...bachelorrete party...wedding stuff. while we were there that weekend i somehow i figured out Connie was going to have another one. it was something that was said. i can't remember exactly. anyway, it was a secret so i couldn't tell anyone. Well, Christmas came and Connie & Levi shared w/ the family about their next addition. At the time i was pg but didn't know. then in january we found out i was going to have another one. we wanted to tell everyone one in an intersting way so i made a shirt that said "big sister" and let mattie wear it when we came to visit my parents one weekend...connie and mia were there too. eveybody was excited but shocked. mattie wore that shirt to church the next sunday to let all our Friendship family know too. they were excited too. well, since i had a c-section w/ mattie Dr. Dowdy said it would be better to just go ahead and schedule one for Ryder. fine w/ me. looking back i wish i had pushed him to let me let Ryder tell me when he was ready....but we went ahead and scheduled it for Aug. 24,2005. i was VERY nervous and emotional and scared b/c i didn't want to happen w/ Ryder what had happened w/ Mattie....blood transfusion. so we get there...Brian and Mattie, my parents, connie and the girls, and Brian's parents were all there, Bro. Dennis & Mrs. Aline were there too. They take me in, numb me up, strap me down, and as they are taking Ryder out i start freakin' b/c i was having a lot of trouble breathing. i do NOT remember this happening w/ mattie. i could feel a lot of pressure while they were doin' their thing but Dr. Dowdy kept reassuring me it was ok. that was a little weird but all in all everything went well. I didn't get to see Ryder while in the recovery room or anyone else for that matter. it was me and a nurse. so i get to my room and all my fam is there. they bring ryder in ....this was all very diferent than w/ Mattie. i knew what to expect and the hospital stay was great. all our friends from church came. our good friend Corey, brought all the youth over to see us. they were excited. all was good. no tears, no sadness. just happy. the recovery was good. I will say that it was hard getting used to, strange as it may sound, there being 4 of us instead of 3. Funny, with Mattie i was having such a hard time with our family being 3 instead of 2. But now i couldn't IMAGINE our life w/out either one of them. We love 'em sooo much. Ryder is handsome, funny, loving, caring, crazy, tough yet tender, sweet, stubborn and hardheaded but loveable. He's our Man Baby!

Recovery...

if you don't know by now, i've joined the "birth story telling band wagon" and i'm telling Mattie's now and i'll tell Ryder's next. here goes....Well, i'm in recovery watching and listening to Mattie scream her head off for four hours...real fun. at the time we lived in Groves, Texas and Brian was the Youth Minister at Friendship Baptist. Mrs. Aline, Bro. Dennis, and Laurie (our pastor, his wife and daughter) each came in to talk to me and then family came in i think..i was pretty out of it. but then they took me to my room and brought mattie in. i finally get to hold her:) i attempted to nurse her...not so fun. during the whole hospital stay i tried...the nurses tried to help...but it just wasnt' happening. i thought i was "educated" on all that but i wasn't. My family was there, Brian's family and big Bro were there, my Grandaddy and Ann were there. Then our friends from church would come and visit. Friendship holds a very special place in our hearts...they got to be apart of our first child's birth and our second one, too. very special time. the youth were away at leadership camp that same week and they would call the hospital to check on us...very sweet! brian had just gotten a video camera, so he decides to set it up on the tripod and video. on the first morning after she was born he set it up and started recording. it is soooo funny now to watch it. he recorded me eating my first meal in like 30 something hours. i mean i was chompin' down on those grits and toast as he was brushing out the tangles in my hair. i'd be like, "ow" b/c he was pulling my hair...and let me tell you NO ONE touches my hair ask Connie. i'm just like my mom! so for him to be brushing my hair was funny in itself..but back to the "ow" part...i would take a bite and scrunch my face up in pain b/c he was hurting my "tender" head....hahahahaha good times. Brian took such good care of me...very loving and attentive. anyway, one thing i didn't tell is that while i was still pg w/ Matt, i was supposed to be taking iron pills - i was anemic(sp?). well, i quit taking them b/c they hurt my stomach. so during the c-section i apparently lost a lot of blood. when i was back in my room, i was getting up to go to the bathroom and the nurse had to catch me b/c i almost fainted. at that point Dr. Dowdy was like ok let's start giving her blood. i had to get A LOT of blood but first i get to sign my life away on this paper that says i won't sue the hospital if i get some kind of disease from the blood they're going to give me. ok first you have to know that Brian and I both "waited" till we got married wink wink nudge nudge. so i'm crying in the bed thinking, "i waited 26 years to have sex and found a guy who waited too and now i'm fixin' to get somebody elses blood that might give me some kind of disease." it was all very stressful and scary but i had to do it. so yeah how fun was that. not very. anyway, my dad would get up early each moring i was in the hospital and come visit me. he had to leave mom and connie in groves b/c he had to get back to work and also b/c my PawPaw, his dad, was VERY ill and he needed to get back w/ him. his birthday came will mom and connie were still w/ me...he had to be alone on his b-day but he was very sweet about it. well, we make it through the hospital stay and on the last day i'm waiting to see the doctor and i just start crying. i didn't really know why but i just knew i wanted to get home to be w/ the rest of my fam. Dr. Dowdy came in and was like, "ok why the tears" and i was like "i don't know". he said, "if this lasts for more than two weeks come in and see me." - he even got one of his nurses to call me when i got home to check on me and reassure me! i knew about the "baby blues" so i figured it was that. on the way home Brian stopped like two times to make sure mattie was ok in her car seat...he so funny. Mom, Connie, and Sue were waiting for us when we got there....roast, potatoes, and carrots were in the oven yum yum! so we get home and get settled. b/c i had a nice incision from the c-section it was very painful to walk and even laugh. i remember it took 2 weeks until it wasn't as painful to get up and down and walk around. now to the part about how i wasnt' ready for mother hood...i didn't even change her diaper for a while b/c i just didn't want to. i was scared i would do it wrong. funny now but not then. connie would come in the living room and be like, "mattie needs to be changed" and i'd say, "you can do it". when Connie and mom were getting ready to leave i would just cry and cry. i cried a lot that week. But Sue stayed an extra week after theyleft so that was a big help! i remember Michawn calling and checking on me and all i could do is cry and tell her of all the thinkgs i wasn't going to be able to do w/ Brian now that Mattie was here. so strange now to think back on all this. Mattie is right there w/ us in all we do now. she loves to ski and loves to swim. our to favorite things to do. funny. anyway....The blues lasted about two weeks. but during those two weeks my sister gets married. i'm so mad at myself b/c i couldn't even enjoy it as much as i wanted to. i couldn't be what is was supposed to be for her. i didn't even get to stay at the house w/ all the girls that were at the bachelorette party b/c i had to get back to this new baby...we stayed at my Grandaddy's house that night. i vividly remember being at the rehearsal dinner sitting next to Connie and she looks over at me and was like, "what's wrong" and in my head i was saying..."i don't know" but i can't remember what i told her. Our friends the Brantly's were keeping Mattie during the rehearsal and dinner so that was very nice not having to worry about Matt during all that. It got worse....i don't know if Connie even remembers this but i actually yelled at my mom during the family picture part...i yelled at her in front of all our family. Ann (my step grandmother but really she's my grandmother) tried to help me by sitting and talking w/ me during the rest of the picture session. my emotions were soooo messed up. (Connie please don't be mad at me for saying all this) i was happy and excited for connie but i couldn't show it like i wanted to. During the wedding, our friend, Sandra Bailey watched Matt, so that was nice. Well, we get her married and while she takes off on her honeymoon and new life w/ Levi....i'm left w/ this baby i'm supposed to be excited about but it just wasn't happening. of course i loved her but it was all so strange to me. well, my emotions and hormones finally got straightened out but it literally took me 3 years to get used to having a child. weird i know. i've always been crazy about my Matt girl but i just had to get used to her...hahahaha. She's means more to me/us than we could have ever imagined. she's beautiful, fun, loving, caring, sweet, hard headed, stubborn, loves her family, loves making friends, loves skiing, loves swimming, loves life, she looks like me but has her daddy's personality...thank God!...i love my Matt girl! Ryder Creek Britt's story next....

My sweet Matt girl!

(first, if you would like to know the answer to my own "?" about the "quiver being full" topic, scroll down to the previous post.) joining the band wagon...Michawn is so graciously and beautifully sharing her birth stories on her blog, Leah shared some of her's and Amanda (Bradford) has been sharing her's too....so i thought i'd share mine....and would LOVE to hear the birth stories of...my beautiful sister, Melissa, and Mer!! any other friends of mine that read this w/ kids.
Well, i told a little bit in my post titled "answering my on ?" about how i was feeling when she got here so i thought i'd share how she got here:)I was two weeks late. Connie had come down for the birth. My parents and his parents were going to wait until it was time. Well, the doc said, "two weeks... too long so lets induce". i had in my mind i was going to do it the "all natural way" w/ drugs:). well, they started the pitocin (sp?) and broke my water at about 7 am Tuesday, June 5, 2001. i got up to go to the bathroom shortly after and as i was standing there and all this water came out...i thought i was "usin' the bathroom" right there on the floor but it was just my water. scared me. i hollered at my mom and was like i didn't just use the bathroom on the floor so she got the nurse for me. anyway, no big deal. i got back to bed, the contractions started coming harder and consistantly. they gave me something to knock me out in between contractions. i would wake up from a dead "sleep" and start breathing in my nose out my mouth. Brian and the nurse would encourage me and tell me how much longer the contraction was going to last, tell me it's almost over, then i'd go out. one time i woke up and Connie, my mom, and Sue (brian's mom) were standing at the end of my bed and staring at me and talking about me (from my take on it). i took my hand and waved them out the door. it's funny now but not then...connie can tell that story better:) by that after noon i hadn't progressed much at all and they tried an epidural wich after MANY failed attempst didn't take but still had to pay for. brian almost passed out b/c he hadn't eaten anything.. i was siiting on the edge of the bed crying during the contractions and crying b/c they were sticking a needle in my back..he was standing in front of me holding my hands, after several minutes of all this stress his face went white and he almost went down on the floor but the nurse got to him first and then they started taking care of him...my mom thought all the hustle and bustle was for me but it was for my sweet Brian. it had been about 10 hours of unnatural ungodly labor and i still hadn't progressed past maybe 6, the doc said, "enough is enough. lets do a c-section". i was like, "whatever just get her out." i think that was my exact words. but a main concern of mine was making sure i was going to be able to be in my sisters wedding which was about a week and a half away. so i made sure i was going to be able to be in it and they started prepping me for surgery. it was all very strange. brian was freakin' out but i didn't know it. there's a pic of him sitting on the floor of the hallway while they were getting me ready in the room. he looked pitiful. he was mad and scared - i had been in pain for almost 12 hours, all along thinking it was going to be one way and now it was totally different...surgery. well, by the time they let him in i was all smiles b/c they had given me some "numb me from my neck down" drugs and i was pain free and happy. when they were taking her out brian heard the doctor say, "there's two" brian was like "WHAT" then the doc said that the cord was wrapped around her neck twice. oh the plans of man and how they fail... i so wanted the "other kind of birth" but had it gone in that direction Matt girl may not be here w/ us...her heart beat never dropped while she was still in the womb so they had no idea that the cord was wrapped around her kneck... TWICE. wow. thank you jesus. anyway, one of the down sides to the c-section was when Matt was out, cleaned up and ready to be held i couldn't hold her....my arms were strapped to the table. all i could do was look at her. i remember Mer. calling me while i was still in the hospital and crying as i told her i couldn't even hold Matt right when she was born. but my sweet brian was right there w/ me and got to hold her and he put her up to my face so i could kiss her. i was in rcovery for about 4 hours and there was a monitor in the room so i could see Matt....she screamed for 4 hours straight...angry she was i tell you! i'm going to stop here and tell my recovery in a different post.....

whoa mamma!

this is for all you girls who just think you gain weight during pregnancy. this is the night before i had ryder. we were eating w/ my fam at Casa Ole'...aka MY FAVORITE MEXICAN FOOD PLACE EVER!! michawn will agree and connie's gag reflex is coming in just about now! hahahahahaha. double click on the pics to get the full effect.

thought i'd throw this one out there:)

answering my on ?...

well, bottom line i never really thought about it much. i just figured two's enough for me. brian LOVES kids adores his own, but says i'm the one that does "all the work" so really it's whatever i want. but i dont' want it to be like that. i want it to be whatever the Lord wants. yeah life in general is expensive, kids, extracurricualr activities, college...all expensive and having more kids makes doing things more difficult. but who am i to say "no more kids for me/us" w/out searching for what the Lord says. i also think about those families who can't have kids or who have tried adoption and its not worked out for them. how blessed am i to be able to have children. it literally took me 3 years to get "used to " mattie. of course i loved her but i wasn't ready to be a mother. i wanted time w/ brian just the two of us. and those of you who know our story fully understand how important that was to me. well, we got about 5 months of that "alone time" then found out i was pg. happy yes. excited yes. then she came. and the tears of joy came then tears of "not ready for this" came. i wasn't in depression but was not ready for all that goes along w/ being a mother. which time took care of itself obviously:) by the time i "got used to her little sweet very active self", i was ready for ryder. only tears of joy this time. i say all that to say... where ever the Lords leads we'll go. life is too short to take it so seriously. and i have a tendancy to WORRY about everthing. so thanks to my friends that left the comments....much appreciated and very helpful!

when is your quiver full.

just wondering what my friends thoughts on this "topic" were. my thoughts later. comment away friends....seriously i'd like to know what y'all think. FYI...i'm NOT preggo but this has been on my heart lately...

update...
as of saturday morning i've heard from leah, michawn, and mer! connie...melissa your thoughts. anyone else who reads my blog... got an opinion? like i said in my response to mer...i'm still praying and searching. yall's respnses so far have an underlying theme...let the Lord guide you. so much easier said than done...

ice ice baby too cold and tanya tucker!

nothing like getting in your frigid car, crankin' it up, and vanilla ice is playing on the radio..."ice ice baby too cold...vanilla ice ice baby, too cold" hahahahaha then i switch it and land on Tanya Tucker..."world says they'll never make it, love says they will..." oldies but goodies.

hope that's not some gang sign and i'm gonna get taken out...hahahahaha